One of my favorite self-care activities is to do a shared Focusing session. It’s easier to get deeper into my body with someone else there to help guide me. Naturally, I only make the time to do this once every couple of months. Because reasons. I mention this because I had a really interesting insight during that last session.
I was Focusing on how much effort I am able to put into many aspects of improving my overall wellness; I have dramatically changed my diet in 2015, for example. I have also walked at least 10,000 steps a day, every day for the past month. These are not small accomplishments, and I’m proud of myself.
What came to me as I Focused on these was how much harder it is for me to just sit and listen. Really? I can choose to make these major, life-altering changes, but ask me to just sit quietly with myself for 30 minutes and I still flinch? Yes, really.
My knee-jerk reaction to reading those words is to try to deny it. But I know that I’m not the only person to struggle with this. We are legion, in fact. I’d even bet that there a lots of other people like me, one year into dedicated mindfulness practice, who have noticed the same thing.
How will I use this information? How will I “fix” this bug. I’ll accept that it’s true, and welcome the feelings that brings up, that’s what I’ll do. I’ll get up each day and try again.